Unrevealed Love

Let's call her 'A'. All these while, 'A' doesn't even give a damn about boys and couple thingy. For her, she is not old enough to have such a feeling towards any man. Some more, she had seen some women that she loved being hurt sooo bad by men. Thus, she's preparing herself not to be hurt by avoiding being too close with any man (men is also acceptable). She's cold-hearted towards her boyfriends (boyfriends here refers to kawan lelaki) but within the group of girlfriends, she's so nice, pleasant and cheerful. The story begin when one day, a guy start greet her in a social network. She doesn't realize when the guy sending her a friend request, and when she approve him as friend. Overall, she has no idea when they becoming friend virtually. Ok let's call the guy as B. At first, she feels like 'ah malas la nak layan'. But after having a few and more chat together, she feels that they have the chemistry as B is an easy-going person . From that point, they're becoming good friend virtually. Everyday B will texts her and everyday she is waiting for B to texts her. They share opinions, thoughts and interests together. And sometimes B will kindly help her doing her assignments. She starts to like things that B like, same goes to B. The most obvious one is when she start to watch EPL. How great the influence that B brings into her life. She changed a lil bit but not much especially the way she treat her boyfriends (kawan lelaki). She starts to break the ice with her boyfriends (kawan lelaki) and sometimes they can even joke around and laugh together. And maybe, the way she thought about men is also changed slightly. Thanks to B. Although she is hardly deny her feeling towards B, but people around her knows that she's in love. The way she smile, the bright of her eyes tell everything. To confess her feeling towards B, it's a never. She's an ego-maniac. It's not her way to approach man. All these while, she never put an effort to start a conversation to B. All she know is to keep waiting for B to start first. She's happy to be around B because he is understanding, protective, know the batas pergaulan, and always protect her as a muslimah. Suddenly, she hear her heart say, "This is it. This is the man that you are looking for." Yes, B is like almost perfect to her. She desperately likes every single thing about B. She is emotionally in love with B. She even thought to spend her lifetime with B even though she is not very sure how B feels towards her. But she knows B feels the same way as her by looking at how nice B treat her.  Neither B nor 'A' has confess the feeling toward each other. The silent love, she kept it at the very safest place in her heart. Nobody knows as long as her heart keep it as a secret. But surely, life is not always beautiful, the sky does not always clear. When the sun is just about to bright, the dark clouds appear. All of sudden, B is lost without trace. At first, she try to bersangka baik, maybe B is busy working on his student life. She try to be understanding as B always do. But the silence, being understanding-like-B is actually kills her inside. She really wants to contact B by any means, but her ego keeps telling her not to. She desperately want to know how B's doing but her ego always stop her intention. At last, she has no other things to do except to cry. For the first time, she cries for a guy. She painfully cries in front of her girlfriends as she needs them to lend her their shoulders. She cries because the relationship that she expected to go further, end up this way. She cries because when she about to trust a person, the person break her trust. She cries because she's unable to get angry and hate B. She accept B for whoever he is, she never ask B to change even a bit although B is not categorized under her 'Mr. Right types'. She loves B for no reason. She cries because the pain she feels inside is killing her. The moment she stop cries is the moment she feels that Allah is around. Allah is watching her cries all night long and only Allah know how painful she feels. She's trying to get close to Allah especially during 1/3 night. Yes, only Allah know her better and can heal her inner pain. She seek Allah almost every night, tells everything she wanted to. If B is meant for her, bring his heart close to her and guide them toward right path. If it is vice versa, thus make her strong enough to accept the fate and guide her to the right path. Slowly, she 's letting B go. She always pray that wherever B is, he is blissful and be blessed by Allah. No pain inside, she is totally healed. She is trying her best to be a better muslimah and keep her distance close to Allah. She knows that Allah has plan a wonderful love story for her, and the time will come InshaAllah. Allah loves her and protecting her from being hurt again. Thank you Allah, for giving her a chance to feel the love towards You.




Everything happened for a reason. Have trust to Allah. For every bad things happened, I always believe that there is something much better awaits me..


"...But it is possible that you dislike a thing which is good for you, and that you love a thing which is bad for you. But Allah knows, and you know not."  [Surah Al-Baqarah, 2:216]




I have read this quote on somewhere but can't remember where. It touched me so much. To the owner of this quote, thanks for making me realize that I am not the owner of the pen.. :)


"Suddenly I somehow know that my life did not need to be this way and Allah had something better for me. I felt Him gently whisper these words to my soul: You continue to get your heart broken because you are holding the pen of your life and trying to write your own story. I am the Author of love, I am the Creator of romance. I know your heart's every desire. I want to script a beautiful tale just for you, but first you must give the pen to me. You must let Me be the center of your existence. You must let Me have total control of your life, and every other area of your life as well..."